I'm In Love!!!!

I have loved Jason since we first saw his photo way back in September. I have loved him increasingly as the months have gone by, as we have prayed for him, waited for his monthly updates, and prepared for his arrival. However, now I can say that I am totally "In Love" whole heartedly, hook, line, and sinker for this little guy. Oh, he just melts my heart and fills my heart with joy!

Our day started later than anticipated when Fion called to say that we were going to Taichung in the afternoon instead of the morning. So, we headed out at 11:30 into very rainy weather, and arrived around 2pm. The foster mom, Mrs. Chiu (we were right JOH friends!) brought him into the TWCA agency and he was very shy at first. We sat down and talked and played toys for a while and eventually I was able to move him from Mrs. Chiu's lap to my own. At one point I brought out his little photo book that we had sent him and as I was flipping through the pages, he finally made his first little noise as he saw and pointed at our daughter, Kate's, picture. Finally Mrs. Chiu just got up and left the room to see what he would do, and as he didn't fuss, she went ahead and left. It was so much fun to sign the Program III wall, where other people who have adopted from JOH have signed. It was really neat to see so many names that I've come to know over the last several months. Before we left we were given all of the things that we have sent Jason and also the wonderful Mickey Mouse outfit that he wore in his first couple of updates. I had asked for the outfit, but found out that it was even more special than I thought as it had come from his birth mother!

Our next stop was the baby store where we picked up an umbrella stroller and some bottles. (I wasn't expecting him to still be drinking a bottle for some reason.) The drive home was very long because of the traffic, but Jason, who had completely missed his nap, was happy for the entire ride. In fact he loved for me to tickle his feet and gave me a smile and a laugh! He also started saying e-i-o, so I sang 'Old MacDonald' to him and he sang the e-i-e-i-o part for me over and over.

Back at the hotel I put him into his pajamas and got his toys out for him. He was mostly interested in hanging out with me, though, and also in the 'Thomas the Train' toothbrush I had brought along. He really is the most easy going little guy. He tripped over my feet one time and hit his head against a table, and he just got up and rubbed it as I comforted him and then went back to his e-i-e-i-os. It is around 4am here now and he has only woken up a couple of times and started whimpering, but was able to go right back to sleep after I comforted him.

I am so looking forward to seeing him with his Dad, brother and sister, who I know are going to totally fall in love with this little man, too.

A bitter-sweet day before meeting our son

It has been a very lovely day here in Taiwan. Tomorrow is the day I have been waiting for all of these months and I am so joyful and excited to meet our son. Sadly, it has also been a very emotional day for me because our dog, Cookie, who I thought was going to pull through an attack from a coyote, is apparently going to have to be put down after all. I have cried my eyes out feeling so much guilt for having let her out alone on the day of my departure and so much sadness at the fact that after five years, she won't be there when I return home.

Now it's time to leave those sad feelings behind, though, and to prepare for this incredibly special day tomorrow. If one good thing has come of this loss, it has made me realize in just a very small, small way what Jason will have to go through and what he has gone through with the loss of his birth-mom and now his foster mom.

Fion is picking us up at 8:40am to leave for Taichung, which is a two hour drive away. The agency has asked the foster mom to bring Jason to the agency because they feel that it will be too hard for him to be taken away from his foster mom's home. I am disappointed that we won't be able to see where he has lived for all of these months, but I definitely want this transition to be as smooth as possible for Jason. Also, I have been told that the birthmom doesn't want to meet me at this time. There is a possibility that she could change her mind, but it doesn't look very likely at this point.

So, a bit about our first day. The flight on Eva airlines was very nice and seemed to go much more quickly than I had anticipated. Fion picked us up at the airport and then took us to the hotel, the Howard Plaza, to check in. Then she took us to a huge souvenir store for some shopping. Unfortunately, I was just starving at that point and could not set my mind to picking out things. After a while we met Fion in the lobby empty-handed and she looked at us with unbelief! Apparently we had missed the downstairs portion of the shop, so we went back and found some fun things there.

We were going to continue on to Chaing Kai-Shek Memorial Hall but we told Fion that we had to eat something first. It was too early for the restaurants to be open, so she pulled over in front of a dumpling stand (I'll add a picture of it) and bought us some dumplings, which were quite tasty! We then carried on to the Memorial, which was beautiful.

Most of the afternoon was spent trying to figure out why my calling card wouldn't work so that I could call home, and then dealing with the news that I had received via email about our dog. We did, however find time to try out the hotel lounge downstairs in the hotel. I discovered my new favorite drink there, the Singapore Sling, or something like that.

Finally, we walked the town and explored a department stores and a few other shops, and ended up at a very popular dumpling restaurant called, ""DIN TAI FUNG", which was really good! We took a cab home, which was quite an experience! Apparently pedestrians DON'T have the right-of-way here. It has been amazing to see all of the scooters and even more so, all of the people that wear mask (like a doctor's mask) to keep from breathing the pollution. My one complaint is that I haven't been able to find "bubble tea" anywhere!

Tomorrow is the big day. I have envisioned it so many times that I can't believe that it is finally going to happen. I just pray that it will be a good day for Jason, and not too tramatic for him.

*****Quick Update!!!*****

I just received news via email from my husband that he took our dog to our regular vet vs. the emergency clinic where she has been, and they really felt that Cookie could heal well given rest at home with medication. Needless to say, my heart is lighter, and I am so thrilled to know that if all goes well with her recovery, she will be there to greet me with Jason back at home!!!!

It's Official!!!!

We received the wonderful news yesterday that our Final Ruling has arrived! This means that Jason Pin-Hao is officially our son, and that hopefully we will be able to bring him home in the next few weeks. We have watched him grow these last five months through pictures and video clips, and we are so incredibly happy and excited to finally be able to have him home with us. I can't wait to see more of what his personality is like, and to see his expression when he first meets his big brother and sister!

Updates are finally in!!!

After a bit of a delay because of Chinese New Year, we finally get another glimpse of our sweet boy! These photos were taken on December 29th, just a few days after we received our last updates. Jason Pin-Hao is just as cute as can be, and I can hardly stand to wait to see him in person!!! He seems to have just the sweetest personality. Hopefully we will get our Final Ruling soon. After that it is still up in the air as to how long it will take to get an appointment with the embassy in Taiwan, which will be our cue as to when we can travel. I am satiated for the time being by these great updates!

First Ruling!!!!!

We just received the news today that our First Ruling is in!!!! This means that within 4-6 weeks we should have our Final Ruling. At one time this meant that we would be traveling to Taiwan soon after to pick up our son. Unfortunately the rules have recently changed and the embassy won't make an appointment for us to pick up his passport in Taiwan until they have reviewed our paperwork, which will be a week or two after the Final Ruling. Then we will get our appointment date, which should be a couple of weeks later. Added to this is the fact that Chinese New Year is on January 26th, which shuts things down in Taiwan for a couple of weeks! So when will we travel? That is the million dollar question. I'm sure my mind will calculate the possibilities an endless amount of times until then!

What’s In An Update?

Those of us who are adopting babies and toddlers from Taiwan through Journeys of the Heart are very fortunate to be blessed once a month with an “Update” of our child. This is not something that every agency provides, and we cherish these glimpses of our little ones who are halfway across the world. They help get us through the months of waiting, the uncertainty, and frustrations that come in this often-lengthy process. Each month we go through waves of emotions that begin the day we receive an update, and ebb and flow until the following month when the next one arrives.

For me it is a ride on cloud nine to be able to see what my little boy looks like each month. Oh, how he has grown since the last photos! Then comes the realization that the photo was taken almost a month ago, so he is probably much bigger by now! Hmmm, how much bigger will he be when he comes home?

We also get a short video clip of our child, who is usually being spoken to by someone in Mandarin. Those of us who don’t speak the language wonder what they might be saying and perhaps create our own subtitles of imaginary dialogue.

How many times do we watch these videos of our children? Who can say? At some point we really don’t even have to watch them. We can close our eyes and push a mental “Play” button and create the whole scene in our head.

Because these precious videos are already so short, you can imagine how cheated we feel if there are fewer than the average sixty seconds, or how elated we feel when they are much longer than usual. My second update video was a mere 38 seconds long, and though I cherished it and watched it numerous times, I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder about it’s length until the next month when my next video was just over a minute long.

Once I have received an update I am usually placated for a week or two. Sending a monthly care package also helps me to forget for moments at a time that I am still weeks or perhaps months from seeing my child in person. By the third week I am counting on the fact that I only have to wait for another week to see my sweet boy’s face once again. Then the day comes when I start thinking that today might be THE day! Then the next… and the next….

My friends on the JOH forums share messages of hope that the updates will soon arrive. Some of us who just can’t take it anymore (that would be me) shoot an email to our agency saying, “I hate to bother you as I know that you are soooo busy, but do you know when the updates might be sent out?”

Usually the delay has come because not all of the updates have come in yet from Taiwan or they are too busy to get them all out right away. To be fair, since we are one big happy family on the forums and all know what is going on with one another, there would probably be a small amount of discord if some of us received an update a week before the rest of the group.

Just when I think that I can’t take the wait one more day and begin to shed a few tears, someone posts the first message that they have indeed received their update! Then starts the cycle of checking the email inbox every five minutes (as opposed to the every fifteen minutes I have already been checking it for the last week) to see if mine has come yet. Nope…nope…nope…

The next day I’m still hopeful but send one more email off to the agency to see if perhaps mine might be coming soon. Alas, I am informed that mine was sent the night before, but was returned as undeliverable because the video was SO LONG! My update comes and I am more than on cloud nine because my video is over two minutes long! My son is also finally wearing one of the many outfits I sent him!

For a few days I won’t think about the uncertainty of this whole process. About the fact that it has already been over three months since my referral and I am still weeks away from knowing whether or not my child’s birthmom has changed her mind. Instead I will make copies of this month’s photo to share with everyone I come in contact with, and I will play the video over and over again until I can lie in bed at night an fall asleep to the images of my little boy playing with his truck.


Lora

While I have stayed mostly with the typical decorations one would find in a toddler boy's room here in America, I am also trying to add a few things that represent Jason Pin-Hao's native country. He was born in 2007, which is the year of the Pig. Not too long ago I was shopping at an Asian market in the Seattle area and found a really fun piggy bank. On another occasion I was shopping at Cost Plus World Market and came across a Chinese Zodiac wall hanging. I'm sure we will find many treasures to add on our trip to Taiwan as well, but in the mean time it is fun to prepare for our sweet little boy to come home.